


Before the Fire Burns Out

by DaniJayNel



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/F, Oneshot, YumiKuri week day 2, death parade au, theme is life or death, yumikuri week 2017
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-20
Updated: 2017-09-20
Packaged: 2018-12-31 22:06:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12142116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaniJayNel/pseuds/DaniJayNel
Summary: “Welcome,” Nanaba started emotionlessly. “This is Deliverance. My name is Nanaba and I will be your bartender. I will now explain what your situation is. Please listen closely. Firstly, I cannot answer questions regarding where you are. Secondly, I will have you play a game. Thirdly, you will choose the type of game by roulette. Fourthly, your lives will be at stake in this game. Fifthly, you cannot leave this bar until the game is over.”orYmir and Historia wake in a strange room, with a strange bartender that demands they need to play a game for their lives. With no real memories and no idea how they got there, what else do they have but to push the button and play the game?





	Before the Fire Burns Out

**Author's Note:**

> My fic for day 2 of YumiKuri week! I'm actually so happy to have this out, because the first half of this had been written like, a year or two years ago right after I watched Death Parade. I never had the motivation to finish it, then I realized it would work well with Life or Death, and I managed to write up the ending bit! Be warned though, I almost legit made myself cry with this fic. I had to take a break and just walk around a bit lol. Hope everyone enjoys!

Nanaba inhaled sharply as her mind reeled back and returned to her. It took a moment for the pounding at her temples to calm, but it did. Slowly she opened her eyes, flashes of memories not her own flying by them.

 _Here we go,_ she thought emptily. Her gaze trained forward. Down the hallway there was a sound of doors whooshing open, and then she strained her ears and caught the familiar tap of shoes on the wooden floor. In a moment two individuals would emerge from around the bend of the passageway, and Nanaba knew what words she would say. In a moment the quietness of the place would be disturbed by tears and anguish, and Nanaba knew not to feel a thing for it.

The moment came, and burning brown eyes seared through her the moment they could. Unlike a normal human, Nanaba felt nothing. Her impassive face did not change, not even when teary blue eyes noticed her too, and sent her a silent plea.

“Welcome,” Nanaba started emotionlessly. “This is Deliverance. My name is Nanaba and I will be your bartender.”

“Where the hell are we?” the one with brown eyes growled. She was tall, much taller than the small blonde girl clinging to her side. She also had short, messy brown hair and a smattering of freckles on her face. The light from the above chandelier threw them into focus.

Nanaba held out a hand in front of her. “If the both of you could take a seat, I will explain.”

The brunette opened her mouth to argue, but the blonde lightly took her hand and they shared a gaze. “Ymir,” she uttered softly. Her voice was like honey, like a gentle breeze through a bright meadow. Nanaba was unmoved. “Let’s just do as she says. She’ll explain everything.”

“Are you sure, Historia?” Ymir’s eyes narrowed and Nanaba wondered what it would feel like to actually be intimidated by them. Historia surely was. Glaring did not seem to work, however, and Ymir eventually relented. She guided Historia with her and then the both of them seated themselves.

“Okay, start explaining,” Ymir demanded. The look in her eyes was threatening.

Nanaba did not even blink. “Would you like a drink?”

“A fucking drink?”

“Ymir.” Historia put a hand on her arm. “Don’t shout, please.”

Ymir’s eyes closed for a moment and then she nodded. “No thanks,” she told Nanaba. “Just please tell us where the hell we are.”

Nanaba straightened her back and nodded. Taking a breath, she prepared to recite the words she said so often that she barely even had to think about it anymore. “Very well…”

XxX

Waking up suddenly in a strange place was one thing Ymir had never expected to experience. Especially since she had a nagging feeling that she was not supposed to be there. When she stepped out of the elevator, Historia was there. Immense relief washed over Ymir and instantly she pulled Historia into her arms. She opened her mouth to speak, but then realized that she didn’t know what she wanted to say. Historia looked equally as confused. In that moment Ymir realized that she couldn’t remember much.

“Historia?” she had asked softly, hesitantly.

Historia nodded. “Where are we?”

Ymir swallowed and looked around them. The walls and floor were of dark wood, and fancy chandeliers lined the dark ceiling above them. Ymir shrugged. “I have no idea. How did we get here?”

Historia shuddered. “I don’t know.”

Now they were sitting on bar stools, and the emotionless blue eyes of Nanaba stared at them as if she had done this too many times to count. The way she spoke was mechanical. Her face looked pale enough for a corpse. Ymir thought her voice was grating.

“Before I explain, I must ask you one thing. Do you remember anything before coming here?”

“N-not really. I remember that we went to bed, I think. That’s all I can remember.” Historia answered timidly. Her grip on Ymir’s arm tightened, and she shared a frightened look with her. Ymir hated seeing her so upset, but felt equal parts annoyed, and couldn’t understand why she would feel that way.

“I remember that much too,” Ymir agreed.

“Wh-where are we?”

“Thank you for answering. Now we can move on,” Nanaba responded. Ymir clenched her teeth hard. Had this asshole just pointedly ignored Historia’s question? “I will now explain what your situation is. Please listen closely. Firstly, I cannot answer questions regarding where you are. Secondly, I will have you play a game.”

“Huh?” Ymir stood from the bar stool and slammed her fists on the table. “A fucking game? What kind of joke is this?”

Nanaba ignored the outburst and continued. “Thirdly, you will choose the type of game by roulette.” Behind Nanaba something dropped down suddenly, and Historia sprang up in fright. “Fourthly, your lives will be at stake in this game.”

Historia paled visibly and Ymir shot her a concerned look. “What the hell is this?” she roared. She grabbed Historia by the arm and took a healthy step backwards.

“Fifthly, you cannot leave this bar until the game is over.”

Nanaba placed a large red button on the counter, still looking emotionally stiff. “If you would please,” she said, indicating towards the button. “Press this and we will begin with your game.”

Ymir’s heart was pounding, even as her head told her that this was all bullshit. She narrowed her eyes at the bartender and then roughly took Historia’s hand in her own. “Come on,” she growled softly. “We’re leaving. This asshole is probably just fucking with us.”

Historia nodded slowly and Ymir pulled her along. They headed back to where they had come, and Ymir stabbed at the elevator button with her thumb. A good few minutes passed and no doors opened, so Ymir tried again, and again and then again. She kicked savagely at the door and sighed when it made Historia flinch.

“Ymir, what if she’s telling the truth?” Historia asked. Her blue eyes swam with tears and Ymir quickly reached out to wipe them away.

“This sounds crazy,” she argued. “How did we even get here? We went to bed and then what? Were kidnapped?”

“What if we were? Shouldn’t we just do what Nanaba says?”

“And play a fucking game? Seriously?”

Ymir heard Historia swallow, and she realized that she was a shivering mess. If her anger hadn’t taken her so easily, Ymir knew that she would have been just as scared. But adrenalin kept her going, and she vowed not to succumb to fear. Historia needed her to be strong.

“Let’s just look around first. If we can’t find a way out, then we’ll go back and play this stupid game.”

Historia took in a deep, shaky breath and then squared her shoulders and nodded. Ymir felt her grip tighten, and a small smile played at her lips. In times like these Historia could show astounding courage, even when she would rather be a coward. Historia was anything but a coward.

They left the elevator and explored the building—or what they could of it. Nanaba watched them scurry about and she barely even reacted. She simply stood and waited, as if she knew for definite that their only option would be to play the game. Ymir saw it, and her stomach clenched tightly. Her movements became frantic until Historia stopped her shaking hands with a warm touch.

“Ymir, we tried this room three times already. There’s no way out.”

Ymir swallowed. “Impossible. There has to be.”

“You cannot leave this bar until the game is over,” Nanaba repeated from where she still stood. “The sooner we play the game, the sooner you may leave.”

Ymir glared over at her, but she knew that Nanaba was right. Reluctantly she and Historia returned to the bar and Nanaba stared at them impassively. She gestured at the button again.

“Please,” Nanaba said. “Press the button and select your game.”

Ymir didn’t want to. Her fingers were starting to quiver and the courage adrenalin had given her was starting to leak away. The only thing keeping her strong façade up was knowing that Historia absolutely needed her right now. With a shaky breath Ymir slammed the button, heart pounding.

A panel slid out from the ceiling behind Nanaba, and then a wheel started to spin. A whirring sound filled the air, growing softer and softer until the wheel stopped and the arrow pointed at one of the items.

“Bowling,” Nanaba said with no feeling. “We shall begin the game.”

A second after the words left her mouth, the ground suddenly started to shake. The space around them transformed, the floor switching out for a fully decked out bowling alley. Historia cried out in fright and grabbed the front of Ymir’s shirt, so she wrapped her arms around Historia’s shoulders and held her tightly.

“You shall play against each other,” Nanaba added.

Ymir sent her a withering look. “And what if we refuse?”

Nanaba didn’t blink. “Remember, this is a game with your lives at stake. Do your lives mean so little?”

Ymir gulped. Nanaba’s complete lack of emotion was insanely creepy and unsettling. So Ymir nodded and pulled Historia with her to the bowling balls. There were only two, and one was pink while the other was purple.

“Ymir, you may go first,” Nanaba stated. She had rounded the corner and was standing close by. “And Historia after you. Try to win the game.”

Ymir hesitantly grabbed the purple ball. When her fingers slid into the holes and she lifted it up, she blanched. Inside she could see an actual beating heart. “What the fuck?” she cried out, dropping the ball back down.

Nanaba stared. “I told you that your lives are at stake.”

Ymir stared at the ball. “Then is that… my… my…?” She couldn’t finish the sentence, but Nanaba understood her anyway. She nodded. “What happens when I throw that ball?”

Nanaba shrugged. “Why not find out?”

Ymir took the ball again. Whatever the fuck was going on, they really had no leg to stand on. It was clear that this strange person had all the power, enough to transform a room and put their organs in a bowling ball. She could feel the wet squelching each time the heart throbbed, and it was in time with the one she felt in her chest. How was that even possible? Sweat trickled down her back. Historia took a seat and stared at her with concern.

“Are you okay?”

Ymir sent her a fake smile. “I’m fine, love. Let’s just get this game over with and leave this place.”

Ymir got into position and stared at the bowling pins. She did her best to ignore the beating organ, and then she stepped forward and tossed the ball as smoothly as she could. It glided effortlessly across the smooth wooden floor, and then slammed loudly into the pins. Ymir waited to feel something, anything, but there was nothing. Her tense muscles eased.

A screen nearby logged in Ymir’s score.

“My turn,” Historia said. She stood and reached for her own ball, but Ymir stopped her.

“Historia, before you touch that ball, you should know that—”

“I know,” Historia cut her off. She gave a brave smile. “I noticed already.” She grabbed her ball then and got into position, so Ymir took a seat and watched her.

As they played the game, Nanaba stood stiffly and watched. There was still tension in the air, but they were slowly starting to relax when nothing bad happened to them. They were actually starting to get into it, encouraging each other and high fiving when they got a good score. Ymir’s turn was up next, and most of the game was done. She had two turns left. She was in the lead by one point, but she wasn’t entirely sure what that meant.

Her latest ball had an eyeball in it, the exact shade of her own. The sight of it made her skin crawl, and even though she knew it was hers, she still felt like it was staring at her. Historia started cheering for her and Ymir sent Nanaba a quick glance. There was no change in expression, just that dull, attentive look. Ymir wondered what her goal was. She turned back around and got into position, then moved forward.

_“Remember, this is a game with your lives at stake. Do your lives mean so little?”_

Ymir faltered. _What is the goal here?_ She and Historia were to play against each other. They weren’t allowed to leave until the game was over. What was the point in trying to win, then? There must be some point. Ymir swallowed thickly. Was it possible that the winner got to leave and the loser had to stay? Would the loser be… killed?

With horror filling her veins, Ymir purposefully flung her ball wrong and completely missed the pins. She noticed with distress that Nanaba’s eyes widened slightly, and when she turned back to see Historia’s concerned eyes, something cold suddenly passed down her back. She inhaled sharply as a memory overcame her, powerful and loud and painful.

_“It’s on fire!” Historia shouted, tears pouring down her face. “It won’t work!”_

_“It’s alright. Stay calm. I’m here.”_

_“That won’t help, Ymir!”_

_“Damnit, just let me get it off you!”_

Ymir came back to herself, vision clearing. She suddenly felt too hot, like there was fire at her back. She went over to Historia and pulled her into a hug. What had that been? Was it a memory? Had that really happened?

“Ymir? What’s wrong?”

Ymir pressed a kiss to her forehead. She was shaking. “Nothing. Let’s just finish this game. I love you.”

Historia looked up at her and smiled. She leaned up and kissed her softly on the lips. “I love you too.”

“Make sure to win, alright?” Ymir told her with a smile. “Or you know I’ll tease you about it for days.”

Historia’s shoulders relaxed and she rolled her eyes. “You’re so difficult sometimes.”

Ymir smirked. “You know it.”

Historia grabbed her ball and prepared to throw it. Ymir noticed that Nanaba had inched closer.

“So you noticed,” Nanaba told her dully. “Have you decided what to do?”

Ymir clenched her teeth together. “So that’s really it, huh? This fucked up game is meant to tear us apart?”

Nanaba didn’t nod, but she didn’t say no either. “Are you willing to win and let her lose her life?”

Ymir’s heart squeezed hard. She heard the crash of the ball smacking into the pins. Her knees were even shaking now—with fear. She didn’t want to die. More than that, she didn’t want to die and leave Historia. She didn’t want Historia to have to leave this place alone, to live knowing that Ymir had died here. But there was no way Ymir would win knowing what was on the line. She would not sacrifice Historia like that. Not for anything, not even her own life.

“Historia will win,” Ymir told Nanaba resolutely. “Even if she doesn’t want to.”

Nanaba’s expression shifted slightly. She gave a small nod and then returned to her previous position off to the side.

Historia came back, grinning brightly. “I got them all!” she announced proudly.

Ymir stared at the scores, relieved to see that Historia had taken the lead by a lot. She gave Historia a double high five and kissed her. “You’re the bomb, babe. Keep at it!”

She went to her own ball and took it, and she threw her turn, getting no points. Historia called out to her, asking if she was okay, but she played it off as a sore wrist. She sat down and stared at Historia’s form as she prepared to throw the ball.

Her chest hurt.

XxX

Nanaba was honestly intrigued by this pair. She had had many couples arrive together to her bar, but most of them broke down halfway through, or argued insistently, or tried to throw the other under the bus. And yet, Ymir was so willing to sacrifice herself to save her lover.

Historia was doing the exact same thing. Ymir didn’t seem aware, but Historia was observing things far more keenly than Ymir was. It was possible that Historia had reached her own conclusion before the game had even begun. Nanaba was curious to see what Historia would do, if she would follow her lover and attempt to save her, or remain silent and let Ymir purposefully lose the game.

Nanaba wanted to see how they would react. She decided to keep their true memories to herself for a little longer, until at least the very last turn.

XxX

Historia’s fingers were shaking badly. She felt sick, like she was about to throw up everywhere. Ymir was yelling encouragements, but she hardly felt better with them. Her hands were sweaty and more than once the ball nearly fell from her hands. She stepped up to the line, inhaling deeply to calm her nerves.

 _I can’t let Ymir win,_ she thought to herself. _I’ve played my part tonight, but Ymir needs me more than ever now. I can’t be the docile weak link. I can’t let her throw her life away to save me. If I have to stay here forever, or die, or whatever, I’ll do it for her._ She felt her nerves settle slightly. It was easier with her mind made up.

Historia threw the ball and watched it spin into the gutter. She got zero points.

Ymir shot up from her seat. “Why did you do that?” she called out. She looked distraught.

Historia smiled, pretending that nothing was wrong. “Oops. My fingers cramped up a bit. You can still win, though!”

Ymir stared at her and Historia stared right back. Ymir shook her head and looked away, and Historia’s stomach dropped. Ymir would be difficult. This wouldn’t work.

“You need to win, Ymir,” Historia told her firmly. “So throw seriously, and win.”

Ymir waved her hands. “No. I won’t do it.” She went over to grab her ball, face determined. If she let this one earn her nothing, then Historia would win whether she scored next or not. Historia wouldn’t allow that. She raced forward and stopped Ymir from throwing.

“Please,” she begged desperately. “Don’t lose, Ymir. Win for me.”

Ymir gave her a sad smile. “I’m losing for you, Historia. Trust me.”

Ymir tried to take the ball, but Historia held onto it. She wouldn’t let this happen. Tears started to press against her eyes, panic welling up inside of her. She didn’t want either of them to die, but between them, she would rather have Ymir survive. There was no way Historia could let Ymir stay while she walked out. Determined, she held onto the ball.

“Historia, let go,” Ymir urged. “Let me finish my turn.”

Historia shook her head. “No.” The tears were leaking now, without her consent. She let her face drop so Ymir couldn’t see them. “Please.”

“Historia.”

“I can’t trust you not to lose.”

“Then you understand why.”

Historia sniffled. She finally looked up and realized that Ymir was crying too. Tears poured over her cheeks. Suddenly Ymir released the ball and it fell between them. Ymir pulled her into a crushing embrace, and then she used her foot to kick the ball, and it shot into the gutter. Historia didn’t even have the time to gasp in surprise. Her nose pressed to Ymir’s throat, and then her eyes were blinded by bright light, and a memory overtook them both.

XxX

_They climbed into bed that night, exhausted. Historia was just glad to have Ymir to hold onto, and she revelled in the feel of her as they settled in bed. Ymir smelt clean from their earlier shower, and she was warm._

_“Mm, you’re warm,” she mumbled sleepily._

_Ymir chuckled. “Am I your human heater?”_

_“Mm, among many other things.”_

_Ymir laughed again and pulled her in closer, wrapping her up in her arms. Historia felt completely and wholly at ease. She fell asleep soon after._

_She wasn’t sure what time it was when she woke up, but she did so when she felt a hand tugging on her arm. She opened her eyes blearily and realized Ymir was right above her, panicked._

_“Historia!” she called._

_Historia shot up. Their room was filled with thick, black smoke._

_“Ymir?”_

_“Our house is on fire,” Ymir told her in panic. “We need to get out now.”_

_Historia nodded and hurried out of bed. She was already starting to cough, so she lifted her shirt to cover her mouth. Ymir grabbed her free hand and together they left the bedroom, but the hallway was completely engulfed in flames. All of the doors to the other rooms were aflame, and the only way they could go was back into the bedroom. They turned to do just that, but a beam from the roof suddenly collapsed and blocked their path. Ymir had managed to pull Historia out of the way just in time._

_Historia cried out and pressed her face against Ymir’s chest. They stood like that for a moment, minds racing. Historia tried to think of a way to get out of this mess without getting burned, but there was nowhere else to go. She opened her mouth to say as much, but then suddenly the floor collapsed beneath them and their screams filled the air._

_Historia fell unconscious again, and she woke a moment later. She felt Ymir behind her, holding her up, and wondered why they were still in the house. Ymir was yelling something, but she couldn’t hear it over the ringing in her ears. Slowly her senses came back to her, and she felt a searing pain in her lower body. When her eyes opened, she realized that another beam had collapsed—right on top of her. There was blood all around them and Historia couldn’t feel her legs._

_“Y-Ymir?” she coughed out, tears in her eyes._

_“Historia!” Ymir gently moved out from behind her and looked into her eyes. The fire was all around them, consuming and destroying everything. Historia felt her consciousness waver. “This beam is pinning you down. I’m going to try and lift it up, okay? Can you move out of the way?”_

_Historia’s head was swimming and her lungs burnt, but she managed to nod. Ymir moved over to the beam and slipped her fingers underneath it. She started lifting then, and Historia finally realized that the beam was on fire. Ymir screamed as the fire burnt her fingers, but she didn’t stop lifting. She managed to lift it a tiny bit, and Historia attempted to pull her body away, but all it did was make pain flare up her spine and she screamed in agony. Ymir couldn’t hold it up anymore and dropped it, and Historia screamed again._

_“It’s on fire!” Historia shouted, tears pouring down her face. “It won’t work!”_

_“It’s alright. Stay calm. I’m here.”_

_“That won’t help, Ymir!”_

_“Damnit, just let me get it off you!”_

_Historia tried to breathe evenly, but there was more smoke in here than actual air. Ymir was wheezing and her sweat dripped off her face. Historia could smell her burnt flesh and it made her want to vomit._

_“Leave me,” Historia choked out. “You can still walk, Ymir. Find a way outside. Please.”_

_Tears made black streaks across Ymir’s skin. “No! I won’t leave you. Not ever. I’ll get this beam off of you, I promise.” She started lifting again, but the fire consumed her hands and the pain was too much. When she realized that Historia was right and there was no point, she slipped behind her again and wrapped her arms around Historia’s chest._

_“What are you doing?” Historia puffed out._

_“Staying here with you.”_

_Ymir was wheezing badly. “You… can’t…” Historia coughed for a long moment, wracked by pain from her waist. “Don’t… Ymir…” But Ymir had already fallen unconscious. Historia reached around and tried to wake her, but it didn’t work. She started sobbing then, coughing and wheezing and begging. But Ymir didn’t wake up, and her consciousness started to seep out._

_The beam on her legs was fully engulfed in flames, and everywhere around them the flames lapped in their direction. Historia realized there was no getting out of this. Ymir’s chest was barely moving. Historia grabbed hold of Ymir’s hands and held on tight, and then she closed her eyes._

XxX

The bowling ball crashed into the pins, making a harsh echo bounce around them. Nanaba watched curiously after releasing their memories in full. They were tightly embracing, tears pouring down their faces. When the final memory completed, they pulled apart and stared at each other. When Ymir lifted a hand and cupped Historia’s face, Nanaba felt something strange. Her chest… warmed.

“We’re dead,” Ymir whispered softly. “That fire… it…”

Historia nodded. “You died with me.” She covered her face with her hands. “Why did you do that?”

Ymir gently grabbed her shoulders. “What life is there without you?”

“Still a life!” Historia snapped. “You would have moved on. You would have found someone else. You would have… have been alive…” Her shoulders started to shake and she grabbed fistfuls of Ymir’s shirt.

“I know, His’,” Ymir said softly. “But I didn’t decide to die there with you. I tried looking for a way out, but the fire was everywhere. I couldn’t get out. My only choice was to hold you tight and die with you.” She caressed her face and forced Historia to look up at her. “I love you more than anything in this entire universe, you know that, right?”

Historia sniffled and nodded, then pulled Ymir down into another hug. “God, what did I ever do to deserve you?” She started to cry again. “But we’re dead Ymir, and only one of us can win this game.”

Ymir lifted her head and sent Nanaba a look. “Do we still need to finish this game?”

Nanaba nodded. She didn’t correct any of their assumptions, and waited as they got over their tears, their kissing, and finally finished the game. They both threw and got zero points, and by default Historia won the game. Nanaba clapped her hands together when it was done.

“Follow me,” she said.

They silently did so, clinging onto each other. Nanaba snuck a look at them and turned away quickly, brows furrowing. There was a peculiar tightening in her chest, leading her to gently rub the spot that began to ache. They reached the elevators in seconds, and Nanaba turned to them. They were staring at her with wide, scared eyes, clinging desperately onto each other. Nanaba reached out and pressed the button on the elevator.

“Please,” she said, gesturing to within once the doors opened. “Step inside.”

They hesitated. “Where will this take us?” Ymir asked softly.

Nanaba felt her expression crack slightly. She softened her eyes and smiled. “A second chance,” she said. “There is neither hell, nor heaven. I am sending you where your souls deserve to go.”

“Where?” Historia insisted.

Nanaba merely stared at them. They seemed to realize that she wouldn’t answer, so they shared a glance and then stepped in together. Nanaba turned to them, but hesitated in pressing the button. They waited, staring. Before she sent them off, Nanaba felt the urge to show her appreciation. She dropped her hand and bowed deeply, eyes trained on the floor.

“Thank you,” she told them.

“Why are you thanking us?” Ymir asked.

“You have shown me something not many of my kind get to see. True, pure love. The love between the two of you filled my entire being.” She straightened and grasped the fabric of her shirt between her quivering fingers. The emotions were swelling inside of her, and then tears began sliding down her cheeks. “So thank you. I will ensure that in your next lives, you will find each other.”

They gave her a grateful smile, and then Nanaba pressed the button and the doors slid shut, sending them to be reincarnated. She remained there for a long time, eyes closed, revelling in the heat in her chest.

Nanaba turned and headed back to the bar, ready for the next two souls.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading ^^ comments are most welcome (and if you're a guest and can't comment, your kudos is appreciated as well)


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